Ron Stoppable is Afraid of a Bris
by TwilightSparkle3562
Summary: When Ron has to attend his newborn cousin's Bris, Kim accompanies him as his date in an effort to take off his anxieties surrounding the ceremony. However, Ron does not take it very well...
1. Anxiety over Tradition

Disclaimer: I do not own "Kim Possible" or its characters. They are property of the Walt Disney Company and its affiliates.

"Ron Stoppable is Afraid of a Bris"

By TwilightSparkle3562

Chapter 1

"Anxiety over Tradition"

Ron Stoppable was and always will be a young man of the Jewish faith. To this end, he was born to embrace the Jewish traditions and customs that came with being one. There was however, one tradition that haunted him greatly every time that he had to be a part of. It all started one day after school when he and Kim did their weekly ritual of walking over to Bueno Nacho. Ron had been trying to hide the fact that he had to take part in this important ritual and Kim was starting to take notice.

"Hey Ron," Kim asked as they sat down at their usual table. "You've been acting that there is something bothering you. Care to tell me what it is?"

"Uh, Kim, now that we are alone," replied Ron, still looking more nervous than normal. "Can I tell you something that is both very personal and very embarrassing to say the least?"

Kim nodded that Ron could tell her what was bothering him, but still, Ron made sure that there was no one else around that would hear what he was about to tell his best friend.

"I'm all ears, Ron," said Kim as she ate a salad. "So go ahead and tell me."

"Um, KP," Ron asked nervously. "There is something that my family is doing this Saturday morning that is related to my…uh…faith, that I despise very much. It is something that my family says is an important ceremony in the Jewish faith."

Kim already had a strong feeling what Ron was trying to tell her. In her mind, what Ron was trying to tell her was something that all young men of his faith were supposed to do.

"You mean, a Br…" Kim started to say, but Ron jumped forward and placed his hand on her mouth in an effort to shush her.

"Yeah, that, KP," said Ron quietly, releasing his grip on Kim's mouth. "It's so embarrassing to see your manhood cut away from you. Hey, I mean, you have it easy. All you Catholics do is have water dumped on your head."

"Everyone is different Ron," replied Kim. "Having that thing that you don't like is a custom of your faith. I mean, didn't you go through a circumcision once?"

Ron knew at this point that he couldn't eat another bite of his food and simply pushed it over to the side. He felt at that moment like throwing up, but this was a topic that he brought up himself and there was no point in turning back now.

"Yeah," cried Ron. "And it was both painful and embarrassing. I don't care what the reason is, saying that it officially makes me a Jewish man. I mean, can't my baby cousin have water dumped on his head instead of having his manhood violated?"

"Look Ron," said Kim, taking a deep breath. "If you are so scared of seeing such an important ceremony, talk to your family about it."

"I did, KP," protested Ron, worriedly. "And did they listen to me, their only son? No! They always said it is mandatory for me to be there. After every single one of those tortures, I have nightmares for days of seeing every male cousin lose their manhood. I mean, how else are you supposed to go to the bathroom if your manhood is attacked?"

It was then that Kim had gotten an idea in her brain. She remembered that the one who was having the circumcision was the same couple whose wedding was not that long ago. She went to that wedding as Ron's date and there was no question in her mind that she would go as his date again for this one.

"I think there is a way for you to not chicken out," suggested Kim. "Why don't you have me go with you as your date?"

Ron was so shocked to hear this that he almost choked on the fries he was eating. In his mind, he couldn't believe that his best friend would want to accompany him to something as gruesome as a circumcision.

"Are you nuts, KP?" remarked Ron, coughing on the lone fry he was eating. "Why would you go to a circumcision as my date? It would be ten thousand times as gruesome as when I got warped into being evil!"

"Look Ron, there is no question in my mind whatsoever that you have to be there," said Kim. "It is very clear to me that you are only afraid because that there is no one to hold your hand when the ceremony is being performed. If I go with you, then you won't chicken out on such a thing."

"But, Kim…" protested Ron.

"No buts!" Kim said firmly, her left eyebrow raised slightly. "I'm going as your date to this circumcision or to put it bluntly, Bris."

Ron then pushed his food away and feeling sick to his stomach, got up and left the table, walking over to the men's bathroom. Seeing her best friend afraid over such a ceremony that was the equivalent of a Christening was something that was not sitting over with Kim very well.

In fact, when she returned home later that day, Kim was now looking for answers and turned over to someone who would frequently look and touch at a man's private areas…her mother, Dr. Anne Possible.

"Mom, I don't understand why Ron would act this way," she said as Anne went through the weekly supply of bills that needed to be paid at the kitchen table. "I mean, don't you see men's private areas all the time? Aren't they all different?"

"Well, yes, but I am not an urologist, Kimmie," replied Anne, stopping what she was doing and looking up at her eldest daughter. "All men's private areas come in all shapes and sizes. Some are circumcised and some are not circumcised. But, I am sure that Ronald has to remember that is all part of his faith and that he will still keep his manhood regardless of what happens."

"I've tried explaining that to him and he just wouldn't listen to me," remarked Kim. "Now, I need to be his date again just so he doesn't chicken out. I mean, I've been to events that I didn't want to be at, haven't I?"

"Yes, that is true," said Anne. "You have, Kim. I don't see why Ronald would think the same way. Attending a bris is a part of Jewish life, despite how disgusting it may be to non-believers. It's like being baptized in a church only more graphic and instead of a grail, you use a pair of scissors. However, it is okay for Ron to be a little nervous. But, he needs to remember that the mohel doing the bris is a certified individual who does these ceremonies all the time and that he has a doctorate."

Kim simply agreed with her mother on that, but it wasn't all that easy from his point of view. In her mind, Ron was being a baby about it. There were plenty of perilous situations that they were involved in and they made it out without as much as a scratch. So, why would Ron act this way now?

"Well, I suppose there is a big difference between being nervous and being a baby," remarked Kim. "Still, he is my best friend and I do need to be there for him despite the behavior he is displaying. The ceremony is Saturday morning, so is the blue dress I wore to his cousin's wedding back from the cleaners?"

"Yes, it's actually up in your closet now, Kimmie," said Anne as Kim got up from the table. "I'm sure Ronald will enjoy seeing you wear that. Besides, it might take his mind off of all the anxieties that he has."

So, Kim made her way up to her bedroom knowing that the sleeveless navy blue dress she wore to Ron's cousin's wedding not too long ago would at least provide a distraction from what he was going through right now. Of course, however, time would tell if Ron was going to lose his nerve…


	2. Meeting the Victim Baby

Chapter 2

"Meeting the Victim Baby"

Ron returned to the Stoppable residence not believing that Kim was going to be his date again. It had only been a few weeks since the wedding of his cousin and now, here he was being sucked into the vortex of Jewish life about to take part in a ritual that he greatly despised. Walking up to his room, Ron threw his backpack onto the ground and they laid himself down on the side of his bed.

"Rufus, buddy, I can't believe this," he said to his pet naked mole rat. "Kim Possible is going to witness something that is so disgusting that is part of my faith? All the things we have done together have always been PG rating if you ask me. So, why is she doing this? Could it be that maybe I am just really being a scared little cat or something? I don't know, pal."

Ron then heard the sounds of knocking at the door and he went down to join his parents in allowing the source of the knock to come into the house. When the door opened, Mrs. Stoppable was delighted to see who was on the other side.

"Motel! Tzeitel! Good to see you again!" she cried, embracing the two of them into a hug. "How are you feeling?"

"Great, Aunt Joann," replied Tzeitel. "Little Fievel here is delighted to be out of the hospital at last."

Ron came forward and saw the baby wrapped in swaddling clothes as he looked up at him. Part of Ron couldn't help but notice how innocent and carefree he was, unaware of the fact that he would go through the horrors that came with being a Jewish newborn.

"Aw, he's saying hello to you, Ron," giggled Tzeitel, and Ron could only reply with a small smile.

"Yeah, I can imagine so," replied Ron, who merely just examined Fievel before walking back. "He must be looking forward to his um, special ceremony coming up."

"Everyone is flying into town for it," said Motel. "Even Rabbi Goldberg is coming in all the way from Tel Aviv tonight. In fact, we were wondering if you could pick him up for us at Logan Airport tonight."

"I'm pretty sure we can do that," replied Mr. Stoppable, directing his attention over to Mrs. Stoppable. "Besides, don't we have my brother and his family coming in tonight? They missed the wedding and said they were not going to miss the bris."

Hearing his father say the word "bris" caused Ron to feel a little queasy at best. In fact, he couldn't help but feel his own manhood start to tingle a little bit caused by the anxiety.

"Um, Ronald," asked Mr. Stoppable, noticing his son's body language. "Is everything all right? You look a little pale."

"Um, yeah Dad," stuttered Ron, trying to not be nervous around his cousins. "But, you know how I feel about brises and I was wondering if maybe…?"

"Yes, Ronald?" asked Mrs. Stoppable, her arms folding in disapproval. "What is it you want to tell us?"

Ron struggled to find the words to say, but ultimately came up with a sentence that would not impact the impending situation at all.

"Would it be okay if Kim comes with me to the bris as a date?" asked Ron.

"Of course, she can come Ron!" chuckled Mr. Stoppable, walking over and patting his son on the back. "Anyone who is a friend of yours is a friend of mine. Right? And I can assure you that this time, you both won't be sitting at the kids' table now, won't you?"

"Yeah, of course, no kids table," remarked Ron, still trying to hold in his feelings. "That is quite exciting then isn't it?"

Sure enough, Ron was happy that he wasn't going to be sitting at the kids table. That to him, was the only good piece news he has gotten so far. In a sense, in his mind, that this was also nothing more than a bribe to get him to come to the ceremony.

"We know you aren't a fan of bris', Ronald," said Mrs. Stoppable. "But, there are some things we have to do that we don't want to do. Besides, everyone will be wanting to see you and Kim together."

With those words, Ron then decided to back away from the group and returned up to his room. His feelings at that moment were ranging from mild to happy to borderline anxious. His parents were clearly going to be caught up in the excitement of the bris that they forget that Ron was even not wanting to attend such an event.

"They caught on to me, Rufus," cried Ron. "They sensed that I didn't want to go and that they are forcing me to go with bribery."

Rufus went over and rubbed on Ron's hand, trying to get him to calm down while also making noises of encouragement to help Ron in his situation.

"What do you mean, just because Kim is coming with me as a date?" remarked Ron. "Really, they don't know that the reason that Kim is going with me is because of moral support. Maybe if they see me faint when they stab Fievel with those scissors, they maybe they will understand how I feel."

Rufus couldn't believe what he was hearing and the naked mole rat did everything in his power to try and make his master see sense. Of course, Rufus didn't speak any good English, so his cries feel on deaf ears.

"Oh, don't complain if I am at risk for collapsing, Rufus," said Ron, as he paced back and forth around his bedroom. "They know why bris' bother me, but they just don't see it, man. They need to see a message from me and they will understand. I don't care if I embarrass anyone if I faint or not."

Soon, Ron went to bed thinking of his plan and Rufus went to bed, trying to think of a way to get Ron to change his mind. There was only one person who could change his mind, but she was already going as his date.

"I'm beginning to wonder if maybe Ron is right about even going to a bris," Kim thought to herself as she went to bed that night. "Maybe seeing a baby's private parts is not the way to go. But, he has no other choice and I have to help him in case he falls into despair."

Kim then looked over towards the sleeveless navy blue dress she wore to Ron's cousin's wedding. It was his favorite outfit of hers and Ron always thought she looked more beautiful in it than anything else in her wardrobe.

So, after looking at her dress which hung on the back of her bedroom door, Kim closed her eyes and went to sleep. The next morning, after getting up and taking a nice warm shower, she put on the sleeveless navy blue dress along with a pair of stockings on her legs and a pair of black dress sandals on her feet. A small red pendant was worn around her neck, giving Kim the chance to wear at least one piece of jewelry.

"All right, Ron," Kim whispered to herself as she walked downstairs and out the door. "I'm going as your date, so might as well make the best of a bad situation."


End file.
